“If what a prophet proclaims in the name of the Lord does not take place, or come true, that is a message that the Lord has not spoken.” Deuteronomy 18:22.

The night of December 31st is usually greeted with prophecies of what to expect of the succeeding year. This is done by church umpires – with so much energy and incontrovertible panache – perhaps to prove the formidability of their pastoral strength. This some copycats among the Muslim clerics have now innovated into their religion, which makes the night seem like a phenomenon for both faiths.

2019 was apparently not left out. At their various crossover ventures, pastors, reverends and “prophets” were said to have, as usual, authoritatively spoken on behalf of God – that 2020 would be a year of joy, elation and ecstasy with none being told the unprecedented strike of the coronavirus pandemic, not only on Nigeria, but on the entire globe. With such a worldwide catastrophe ridiculously hidden from that god that imaginarily and hallucinatorily speaks to them, it would not be out of place for churchgoers to ask those charlatans to vacate the altars.

Being of God isn’t about speaking authoritatively for or like God – as done most of the acclaimed men of god today. Those who were endowed with such a rare quality were the gone prophets and messengers originally sent by God. All revelations they claimed were from God came to pass as exactly reported – the reason their prophethood and messengership (of Muhammad, and that of Jesus, for instance) live indelibly on.

Nigeria is such a lowly country where people are gullibly tricked in the name of religion. All that matters, especially with respect to the church, is a tongue that appeals mesmerically to the mind, a voice that echoes deafeningly to the ears, gesticulations that align hypnotically with the lies peddled, et cetera.

To speak for “god” in Nigeria, the only skill required is motivational tongue as summarized above. And it worries, despite the obviousness of the fabrications, that Nigerians still hold those liars in high esteem, and their fables they continue to believe, gullibly. If this is no voluntary stupidity, then it must be forceful mediocrity.

The practice of prophesying isn’t a peculiarity of pastors, imāms and alfas do it too under the garb of problem-solving. Making it a norm at crossover nights seems the newly-innovated trend as this they weren’t known with ab initio. And people’s hearts are gained where the abracadabric prophesies hit the desired targets. With that, they would be accorded reverence, not only by mouth, but by having their pockets fattened.

For COVID-19 not to have had its way into the 2019 prophecies which they claimed were all from God, it would either mean that the “god” that speaks to them is a liar or that certain phenomena are beyond his reach. God forbid that we serve a less-potent – or impotent – god!

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