Opinion: Defining Feminism with Chimamanda By Ashraff Adeyemo

Does being a renounced writer makes someone a philosopher? Because, we keep seeing Prof. Wole Soyinka on the round table with European philosophers discussing critical topics and most of the time they just intellectually derail him.

Probably they have been given the wrong tool to the wrong man or wanted a face of black on the table or it is just an extension of trying to let black see that they are not that intelligent after all. Because, come to look at it, M.I and Vector (lyrists) must have had more contribution to literature today than Wole Soyinka but can not just be invited to an intellectual round table which sees them more as a clown.

If I am wrong about the above, then I can only be right about Chimamanda Adichie being in the best position to define Feminism for us. Feminism is being defined by a lot of people today, both male and female. Most times the male paint it black, and I will like to listen to those that see it as sound for a good discussion on the topic. Yet I can’t vouch for the correctness of those that do paint it black, because if it is out of hatred and not logic then they are wrong. 

It is simple to get going in this definition. Thanks to Beyonce in a song ‘Flawless’ which featured Adichie’s speech on feminism, anyone can get hold of the definition. Adichie is an internationally recognized writer, a Nigerian with scholarships, an open feminist, and a happily married woman with beautiful wards. It is noteworthy, and in the sense of fairness to add that Adichie is not one of those irrational feminists that just want to talk down men. Adichie’s position is about ‘equality’, and that might just be why we are calling her out since she is an epitome of scholarship which her view on this contradicts ours: we have always not seen gender ‘EQUALITY’ but ‘EQUITY’. Someone has to be right.

Lets review her speech that defines feminism: 

…Because I am female
I am expected to aspire to marriage
I am expected to make my life choices
Always keeping in mind that
Marriage is the most important
Now marriage can be a source of
Joy and love and mutual support
But why do we teach to aspire to marriage
And we don’t teach boys the same?
We raise girls to each other as competitors
Not for jobs or for accomplishments
Which I think can be a good thing
But for the attention of men
We teach girls that they cannot be sexual beings
In the way that boys are
Feminist: the person who believes in the social
Political, and economic equality of the sexes

There is a clear part where feminism was defined, however, we are dealing with a writer here, which we expect style, logic, and classic technique of communication. The preamble is to let us understand and put the definition into the right perspective and context, and you will agree that this was achieved. 

The contextual statement: “But why do we teach to aspire to marriage
And we don’t teach boys the same?”

If we ask this question from our mothers, some probably might meet us with a face of guilt. But is that called for? The biological structure of a woman made her reproductive maturity fast and life cycle short. When a woman might lose her potency at the age of 40, a man might have his forever. So logically, I can leave a man to 40 when he is no more ‘foolish’ to start talking about marriage. I can,t do that to a woman. Is this men’s fault? This is so simple a logic, but we live in a world where common sense is an outlaw needed to be waded off. Adichie might realize this later in her motherhood and do the needful, but will she come back to you that have lost your procreation cycle to ‘feminism’? You know for a man, what is expected is deep thinking, not deciding on the surface, and since they have been the head of the home for years they might be the one that passes down the ‘marriage preparation’ thingy in the family system. However,  It cant be skipped, the fact that women have the power to multitask more than men; these are opposite but complimenting abilities in our homes. Keep men in the house, he might burn down the kitchen while watching a movie and tieing up babe diapers, but women do that perfectly. Abilities, totally not the same, but complimenting and equally important. 

If the same question above was asked a father, it will also contradict the shallow stance of Adichie. ‘who told you that boys don’t get ‘marriage’ talks from their parents?’. A good parent will teach boys how to behave in a marriage, be responsible to the children, respect and care for the wife. The failing marriages today can not be only blamed on men alone because most time, the men are out to fend for the family. So what are the mothers passing down to the boys? However, from the last generation where women work like men and the system tries to equate them, children are left to be trained by the wind and TV and they today become terrible parents. So again, I say, can we talk more about gender roles and relationships with their uniqueness?

Feminist: the person who believes in the social
Political, and economic equality of the sexes

The analogy that Adichie drew before this definition is what crumbles feminism and makes it dangerous, just like some other implication of women when it comes to decision making which can be shallow thoughts powered by emotions. I can’t believe that Adichie’s speech was made in a public place and wasn’t challenged. I can’t deny that in some aspect or situation women make better decisions than men, so why can’t we focus our energy on the aspect where women make better decisions and allow them to run the place? Why do we have to mix things up and ruin things that cant be corrected in the future? Or, how can you come back after 40 years to start having babes like a 25-years old, when all a man is to do in the process is to give sperm, a cell that will always be with him forever?

so, from the definition up there, we can say feminism, is a shallow movement, entitled, and an extension of nagging that many men will still be clear of like they do ignore women so that they won’t get into unnecessary rash bashing. however, the existence of what is called ‘feminism’ today is wreaking the fabric of our society the more (That is a topic for another day)

So, redefine feminism, please.

The views expressed in this article are of the authors and do not necessarily reflect Know Islam Project’s policies. He can be reached via [email protected]